Friday, September 19, 2008

The Red Herring: Part II


I'll be the first guy on the boat if an ex-Yankee decides to start bashing the shit out of Bobby Abreu. Fuck it, I'll captain the boat. I'll even wear a stupid fake captain's hat and walk around like a douche for a full afternoon if it's guaranteed that someone comes out and calls Abreu a lazy, worthless piece of do shit.

But Schilling must be stopped.

Am I biased because I hate the man? Yes. Does it bother me that he seeks the limelight even though he's being paid to sit around, feed his dog(s) table scraps and watch boxed sets of great TV shows that he probably gets sent to his house for free? Yup. But I don't understand why Schilling decided now was the time to bash Manny Ramirez.

Boston's been on a roll, no thanks to fat Curt and his gaudy ego and self-righteousness. No, Boston's pretty much been winning because of good pitching and good hitting, and because Manny is no longer with the team. And it was a divorce that needed to happen. One could argue that it was a malicious, dysfunctional breach, but one could also be a dickhead from Worcester with an awful accent and Marlboro Red/beer-breath.

In any event, I do not condone Manny's actions. In fact, I think he is an asshole for deciding to shut it down. Then again, he is retarded, but still, what's right is right, right?

What I find more aggravating is when someone outside the equation, Someone who has not spent a millisecond with the club during the regular season, decides it's his time to speak up on behalf of "his" team. The team that does not miss him one bit (assumed, because I hate him). And that's exactly what Curt did yesterday. And it makes me want to walk backwards down a flight of pudding and KY covered stairs.

So, how do we stop these people from attacking with reckless abandon, if only to be relevant for the moment? We don't. And this post would have never surfaced, if it was someone other than Schilling who came out and said, "Fuck that lazy bitch." If Bill Mueller challenged Manny to a fist-fight, I would be all for it. If Todd Walker told all his friends that he saw Manny giving a groundskeeper head - a la Vito Spadafore - in the wee hours of Fenway's player lot, I would consider his word truth. Maybe I'm a little bored, and in the mood for some Schilling hating, but what can't be denied is the pitiful, desperate plea Schilling has decided to make weekly in order to feel important again.

So fuck him.

And fuck Bobby Abreu, too.

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