Monday, November 17, 2008
Farewell To an Arm
Always unpredictable - and not in the struggling alcoholic, borderline-psychotic way - Darrell Rasner has finally been removed from pinstripes.
The Tohoku Rakuten Golden Eagles of the Pacific League bought his rights for $1 million. How the fuck Cashman scammed the Jap's out of this much money for a below-average right-hander is beyond me, but anyone who was subjected to Rasner's penchant to give up devastating home runs last year knows he isn't worth a bag of shit, let alone seven figures of real-world money.
Here are some of his Yankee highlights:
September 3, 2006 - Rasner makes his debut for the Yankees at home against Minnesota, squeaking out a 10-1 victory, blowing batters away with 2 K's.
April 8, 2007 - Behind the imposing rotation of Carl Pavano, Andy Pettite, Mike Mussina and Kei Igawa, Rasner makes the 5th start of the season for the Yankees, going 4.1 innings and giving up 5 runs to the offensive juggernauts, the Baltimore Orioles.
May 19, 2007 - During interleague play against the New York Mets - the same team that will go on to blow a 7 game lead with less than three weeks left in the season - Rasner can't get out of the 1st inning, and is optioned to AAA Scranton before the game is over.
May 21, 2008 - Rasner improves his record to 3-0, with 1.89 ERA in 3 starts. Retarded Yankee fans everywhere crow that he is the answer to the back-end of the rotation troubles. Every realist promptly punches said idiots in the eye.
August 3, 2008 - Finishing a 18 game stretch where he goes 2-10 with a 6.18 ERA and opponents bat .317 against him, he is mercifully removed from his starting duties.
So, the Rasner era is over in New York and somewhere in the Bronx, some poor, uneducated bastard who blew $200 on an official Rasner replica jersey weeps. The rest of the Yankee Universe moves on with their daily lives, mostly forgetting the superiorly mediocre #43.